Understanding yourself is the key that unlocks mature love. Would you take the time to digest and understand the patterns of the first half of your life? What kind of relationships did you build, what roles did you play, what did you give and what did you get? Finding your own late love often involves pattern shifts, and loving someone entirely different than the person you thought you were looking for.
Harville Hendrix wrote that “marriage is a psychological and spiritual journey that begins in the ecstasy of attraction, meanders through a rocky stretch of self-discovery, and culminates in the creation of an intimate, joyful, lifelong union. Whether or not you realize the full potential of this vision depends not on your ability to attract the perfect mate, but on your willingness to acquire knowledge about hidden parts of yourself.”
Do you know what you are hiding?
Love After Love, Derek Walcott
“The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,
and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self…”